Sierra's View: September 2014

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Thursday, September 25, 2014

September Slumber Soiree!

My Blogging friend, Aubrey, put together a fun September Slumber Soiree party last week. 
I had these plans to stay the entire time and talk about blogs and girly stuff and have a marvelous time.
Alas, T Money called, and well, as my life would have it right now, I couldn't stay the entire time and had to leave early. But for the few hours that I was there, it was so incredibly fun. 
It was so fun to meet and re-meet so many fun, kind, and hilarious women through the blogging world. 
I am so grateful for the support and love I get from this hobby or job or whatever you want to call it! 
(except from my own family and best friends! Come on, guys! Sheesh).
I'll let the pictures do the talking. 

hahahaha I am dead serious. 

Love these girls so much!!!
Top row: Ashley, me, Jacque
Second row: Kyla, Kimberly
Third row: Laura 

All photos taken by Kaycie! 

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

The Time is Now | Stepping Out of Our Comfort Zones...

I did something really gutsy.
At least, well, for me. 
It's been since freshman year of college that I have been in a play.
Last week, I auditioned for a play, a musical to be exact.
I still don't know if I made it, but to be honest, I don't really care. 
I did the hard part: I auditioned.
I felt really out of practice and quite uncomfortable. But I did it. I stepped out of my comfort zone, which I am continuously working on (hello fashion posts! Woo) and took a chance. It felt really good. 
My life is quite insane…being in 4 weddings in a month, teaching full time, being actively involved with the young women with my church….and don't forget about softball and exercise program I'm on…but I couldn't shake this feeling that I wanted to get on stage. That I needed to perform. Or, well, at least try. I felt this nagging feeling to do something that gave me something to look forward to! I felt stuck. I felt like I was doing the same routine over and over. And, well, since I am a spontaneity buff and adventuresome soul, I did what not many people can do, I stood and sang and let people judge me. 
It was really hard. I haven't done that in a long time.
But I am proud of myself for taking this little step. 
I don't know if I made a lead role, but I received a call back last night. Which, in a way, is a huge step. 
I am a true believer in doing things for yourself. For living a life that you want. And to live that life RIGHT NOW. The time is now to do what you have been afraid to do. The time is now to live out your dreams. Are you scared of something but really want to try? At least try. I feel invigorated. 
And that, my friends, is a good feeling. 
Step out of your comfort zone. You'll feel that way too. 

With my audition, I had to turn in some headshots. 
Speaking of comfort zones and taking chances NOW, I decided to let you guys see some of my close up face and my head shorts. 
Boo ya. 

So, let me ask you: 

Monday, September 22, 2014

Rainy Day Activity: Captain America and M&M Chocolate Chip Cookies

This shop has been compensated by Collective Bias, Inc. and its advertiser. All opinions are mine alone. 

Today was a rainy sunday. A day, I must admit, that I absolutely love. In my opinion, there is nothing better than curling up with your significant other, turning on a movie, making some yummy cookies and having a cozy evening. No worries except for just enjoying the company of each other. 
Luckily, T Money and I finally found something that we both wanted to do-- Captain America 2: The Winter Soldier and M&M’s Chocolate Chip Cookies. Do you guys ever go through this as couples? Where you can't seem to agree on something at a date night. For example, one of you wants to watch a different movie or have a different treat. Does that make sense? Or is that just us? Luckily, T Money and I teamed up with #HeroesEatMMs and #Collectivebias to enjoy a lovely, fun Sunday evening together. We love our date nights because these are nights that we have often after a long week together. 

Yesterday, knowing that we wanted to have a fun Sunday evening, Tanner and I headed to Walmart to pick up some yummy M&Ms and Captain America 2: The Winter Soldier. 
We stopped by the Retailment Event at Walmart that had some yummy yogurt and characters from Captain America. 

We found the M&Ms in the candy/snacks section of Walmart. Captain America was in the movie section in the back. 

Today, I came home and started making these cookies. 

First, I made the chocolate chip cookie dough. 
This is the recipe that I used that I sort of made up on the spot : 

1/2 cup butter, room temperature
1/4 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup brown sugar, packed
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1/8 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons half and half
1/2 cup all-purpose flour

Half bag of Chocolate Chips 

To prepare the cookie dough, beat together the butter and sugar until light and fluffy, about 3 minutes. Beat in the vanilla, salt, and half and half. Stir in the flour until incorporated. Pour in chocolate chips. Along with the chocolate chips, I included the M&M's in the dough to add a delicious taste. 

Wah la! These delicious cookies were made! 
We turned on our movie, ate this cookies and enjoyed a fantastic evening! 

Nothing better than a relaxing, rainy Sunday evening with a cute husband. 

Friday, September 12, 2014

Puppies and Dresses.

I am on a dress roll. 
(Also have you noticed i'm sort of on a fashion roll, too? Another fashion post…I'm finally feeling confident in my style!) 
I have found that wearing dresses to work are way more comfortable, flowy, and easier. 
I don't feel as cramped or hot (even though fall is happening!). For me, dresses and skirts are easier and more flattering on me than jeans or work pants. (plus trying to find a pair of pants with these thighs and butt and hips…so impossible!) 
I got this dress from Eshakti. Have you guys seen these site? It's fantastic. They handmade me this adorable dress for my good friend's wedding in a couple of weeks. I love the ruffles, length and fit. 

So, even though I feel so uncomfortable in these posts, I am putting myself out there.
Because I believe that stepping out of your comfort zone makes you more confident. 
So, enjoy :) 
Saylor also wanted to be in these pictures.
Can't blame her.
She's a diva. 

So, basically, the resolution we have come to over the past thirty seconds is this: 
puppies and dresses are awesome. 

Outfit details
Dress: Eshakti 
Cardigan: H&M
Shoes: Target
Purse: Jessica Simpson. TJ Maxx.

Don't forget to enter my birthday giveaway here.

Also, some friends and I are giving away $125 dollars cash. Who doesn't love cash? Good luck!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Thursday, September 11, 2014

Pushing Students Out of Their Comfort Zones | A 9/11 Post.

Recently, I have to admit, I have been very negative towards the people around me.
I love people. I truly do. But often times, I see the negative attributes about them. I wouldn't necessarily consider myself a pessimistic person, but kind of looking at the negative in every situation. Or, particularly in people.
With my students, with my friends, with my coworkers and with my husband.
I think it correlates to the fact that I have such high expectations for everyone, including myself. That, I, unfortunately, get let down.

Something in my head clicked today, though. Something changed. And I learned a huge lesson.
Sometimes life smacks you across the face.
Because, well, sometimes each of us need to be smacked, in a sense.
I realized that learning, that recognizing, the potential and good that people have, you will be seriously impressed.
I learned this, specifically, in my life as a teacher with my students.

Today was the Thirteenth Anniversary of 9/11. I have posted many thoughts on this special day here and here.  
I usually show a video about 9/11 (especially because my students weren't even alive when this happened! Crazy, huh?) but this year I showed two videos that were a little more intense and emotional, if you will.
I was nervous to see how my students would react.
But, you know what happened?
They became emotional. I had two boys cry. I had two girls cry. We, then, went into a long conversation about what it means to be an American, to be proud of where we are from, and how trials like these can help people grow. I was in awe as I watched them feel things that adults won't even let them feel. I have to admit that I almost got emotional as I chatted with them and watched these videos. If you have a few minutes, please take some time to watch these videos. They are touching and a perfect fit for a special day like today.
I didn't think my students would truly understand. I was nervous that I would be showing my students these videos and they wouldn't respond; that they would be immature and naive about it. But, they were most definitely not.

I also pushed my students more than usual thinking and writing skills by analyzing, thinking about, and talking about The Giver. I was truly amazed about how well they did.

Each year that I teach, I am amazed at how much more these kids are knowing. With the advancement of technology and maturity of twelve year olds nowadays, there are a lot of negatives that are correlated with that. But because of those things, we are also able to have amazing days in class like this. I wanted to hug about half of my students and let them know that what they were feeling was okay…that it's a good thing to actually feel something.

When you push your students out of their comfort zones….
You will be amazed at what you find.

Today, I am proud to be an American.
Today, I am proud to be a teacher.
Today, I am proud of my students.
Today, I am proud of who I am and where I am.

We will never forget. We will always remember.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Ten Books That Everyone Needs to Read.

My good friend, Kristen, tagged me in a post of Ten Books that Have Influenced Me on Facebook. Often, I get tagged in things like that and ignore them. Sometimes i believe that they are silly and don't affect me. But this is one that I genuinely liked. Perhaps, it's the book nerd in me that clung to this.
Rather than just posting it on Facebook, I thought that this would be a good post. Mostly because I just have a lot of thoughts on these books.
Also, instead of just books that I like, or books that I thought were good, I wanted to talk about Ten Books that have Changed Me. In my life. I think these are ten books that everyone, truly, needs to read.
I present to you, ten books that have changed me. Ten books that have influenced me. Ten books that need to be read every single one of you. Some of these are
I put these in order of my Top 10 favorites. Enjoy.

10. Something Borrowed Series-Emily Giffin.

Okay. This is such a guilty pleasure novel. I would never consider this a classic, nor the best written novel in the world. But it is SUCH a catchy novel (series) that reels you in. Ladies, you will especially love this. I hate to admit that I love this book, but it is awesome. 
“Maybe the thing to do after you roll the dice-and lose-is simply pick them up and roll them again.” 

9. Harry Potter Series- J.K. Rowling 

Enough said, really. Need I explain this? 
It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities. 

8. Where the Heart Is- Billie Letts

This book describes the upbeat side of tragedy that comes through at every turn. I was pleasantly left with the optimism that good will prevail. I know some people may think this book is naive and poorly written, however, I loved it. I thought it was a joy to read and emotionally satisfying along the way.
“...tell them that we have some good in us, too. And the only thing worth living for is the good. That’s why we’ve got to make sure we pass it on.” 

7. Pride and Prejudice-Jane Austen

Okay, but really. What mid-twenties woman hasn't read this book? This is a classic. Simply, a classic. That's all. 
“I declare after all there is no enjoyment like reading! How much sooner one tires of any thing than of a book! -- When I have a house of my own, I shall be miserable if I have not an excellent library.” 

6. My Sister's Keeper-Jodi Picoult 

Okay, I may be weird, but I sort of love books that make me cry. Not because I like to cry. But because I love novels that make me feel things, that take me to a place where I truly connect and feel for the characters and the story. 
“You don't love someone because they're perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they're not.” 

5. The Help- Kathryn Stockett.

The Help is a meaningful story of racism, humanity, and divine female rights. This book absolutely grabbed me and made me read. As my eyes sprinted over the words, I began to feel the characters’ pain and emotions. 
“You is kind. You is smart. You is important.” 

4. Tuesdays with Morrie-Mitch Albom. 

The book title says it all: an old man, a young man and life's greatest lesson. This book is full of amazing lessons, quotes and learned experiences. It is a novel that every human needs to read to just learn a lesson. 
“So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.” 

I wish I could explain in better words how much I love this book. It is one of the very first "dystopian society" books. I love reading it to my sixth graders and watching them analyze and take it all in. I love the theme behind this book: the idea that love and feelings are the whole purpose of this life.

“The worst part of holding the memories is not the pain. It's the loneliness of it. Memories need to be shared.” 

2. To Kill a Mockingbird-Harper Lee.

When I asked my grandmother,  Meme, what her favorite book was when I was 10 years old she said this novel. When I read it in high school, I was overwhelmed with memories and nostalgia for this special lady. I am not sure if it was Meme that inspired me to read this novel or something else, but I ate this book up like nobody's business. It was one of those books in high school that you should actually read. I learned so many lessons about attitude from Scout. I learned about tolerance from Atticus. If you  have not read this classic book, you need to read it now. 

“You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view... Until you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it.” 

1. The Book of Mormon.

Aw come on, guys. You had to know that I was going to go here. My faith is a huge part of who I am. I have been going through a lot of changes with what I believe, disagreeing with parts of my culture, etc. But, when it comes down to it, this is a book that has changed me. It has brought me closer to my Savior. It has made me a better person. Seriously, what could be better than that?

Mosiah 14:5
But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. 

What books would you add to this list? 
What are some of your favorite novels? 

Also, don't forget to enter my birthday giveaway

Tuesday, September 9, 2014

Birthday: Thoughts and a Giveaway!

Well, it's my birthday. 
I did it. I survived another year.
And I thought to myself…how cool would it be if I got to include some of my favorite bloggers (and a couple non bloggers) to say a few things about me, whether a favorite memory, post or just thoughts on me.  I have lots of new followers, and hey, what better way to get to know this birthday girl then from other peoples' thoughts?! I have loved the friendships I have made through blogging. These girls are such wonderful bloggers and people. I loved reading what they had to say :)

I will be hiking and eating a yummy dinner with my husband tonight. 
You…well, you, get to enjoy this post. 
And a little surprise giveaway at the end! Enjoy! 


I don't know that I have a specific memory of Sierra, but I always love how open and honest she is! I always know that Sierra is willing to chat about anything under the sun! I love her outgoing personality and genuine concern for others.
---Amberly (Life with Amberly and Joe) 

By far my favorite post and how I first stumbled across Sierra's blog is this one:
Things Not to Say to Someone with Depression
It really hit home with me and above all showed me that Sierra was a genuine person, that didn't hide behind fluff on her blog. Now can we be real life friends, pretty please?!

You seriously have a heart of gold and I'm so glad that we crossed paths in this big old blogging world.  I feel like you're my twin and you encourage me to never be ashamed of who I am, depression and all.  It's pretty freaking freeing!!  You have a light inside of you that I don't even think you realize you have; of confidence, grace, charm, and loyalty.
-Rachael (The Rachael Way)

One of my favorite memories with Sierra was actually the first time i met her. there was a meetup at the awful waffle in provo. i ended up sitting next to her. we bonded over unwashed hair and laughed and laughed all night long.
-Aubrey (Aubrey Zaruba) 

I'll tell you how I actually meet Sierra, like most people I know- I met her online.
So I was looking through Pinterest and came across one of Sierra's formal wedding pictures, so I clicked on the link and serious fell in love with her and Tanner's photo session! I just thought to myself "This couple is perfect and the photos were done so well and just everything was perfect!!" I then some how found her Instagram account and fell in love with Sierra even more, I had a total girl crush on her! ;) She had her blog link in her bio and uhm hello! Even better, she's a blogger!!! So I read through her blog, commenting on posts and hoping she'd notice me... she finally did. :3 When she came to my place for a blogger get together, I was low key fan girling because my girl crush is in MY house... and the rest is history! ;)
-Camille (Confidently Aligning

When I met Sierra it wasn't like I was really meeting Sierra. We'd been internet friends for... I don't know... 2-3 years? Does that sound right Mrs. Charlesworth? We emailed about teaching, blogs, BYU, and soon turned to texting about our families, puppies and friends. So when she showed up at my door for Harry Potter Book Club this spring it didn't even feel like meeting for the first time. Sierra is very much herself online - if you follow her on any social media you KNOW her. She's honest, open, true. It's refreshing in this online world of fake personalities or being more interesting online than you really are in real life. So instead of saying we've been friends for a few months, I'd like to wish my friend of several years a big Happy Birthday and best luck in your next year!
-Danica (Danakin Skywalker) 

How did I even begin to talk about Sierra? Let’s start from the beginning.
Sierra and I met during our freshmen year at BYU-Idaho. We had practically ever class together so we were destined to become friends. Sierra was spunky and direct and at first it took me off guard but she was exactly the kind of friend I needed. Life happened and we didn’t stay quite as close because of distance but as destiny would have it we both ended up in Utah. We both started blogging and as many of you know, nothing brings you together quite like a blog! Sierra was always there to talk shop, for a boost of confidence when I was nervous at a blog get together, and always available when I needed a late night chat with someone. Basically, Sierra is the kind of friend that every girl wants and needs in her life. She will tell you exactly what she thinks, she will be blunt with you, she will be 100% committed and completely loyal, and she will just be there for you whether things are looking up or down.
So Sierra. Happy birthday! You’ve made a large impact on a lot of lives during your 24 years on earth. I know everyone around you thinks the world of you. And just for the record, I do too. Thanks for always being the kind of friend I need. Love you!
--Kelsey (Stories of Kel) 

I. Love. Sierra. Sierra is one of the kindest and sweetest person I have ever met in my entire life. Even if she is down or going through a hard time, she will always have a smile on her face. Sierra inspires me to be happy. Because that is what she's best at - being completely optimistic and positive about everything. Happy birthday sierra!! I love you! 
-Amanda (We and Serendipity

HAPPY BIRTHDAY week, Sierra!
When I first started blogging Sierra was one of my first followers and her blog was one of the first that I followed. I think that was about 2 years ago. Sierra and I became instant virtual-friends, she always left the most thoughtful comments. I always loved reading them, because you could tell she actually read and thought about the post, which is the reason we all blog, right? We want people to read what we have to say and to provoke thoughts that might not have occurred otherwise. There were plenty of times in that first year that I was ready to give up on blogging, it’s another full time job. You have to maintain relationships, keep up on sponsorships, and of course, create new content on the daily - it can be pretty rough. It’s bloggers like Sierra that keep this fun game going. She has original fun posts, she is detail-oriented, organized and never EVER forgets.

Recently, after 2 years of being virtual friends, I finally met Sierra. We were texting for 2 weeks prior about a blogger meet up and I really wasn’t sure if I wanted to go. She kindly convinced me that I had to go and kept checking into to make sure I knew that she wanted me there, another great characteristic she has. So I arrived 45 minutes late and she still had a spot for me saved. Outside of being a great blogger, she’s really a great friend. A few days after the blogger meet up, we went to Martina McBride together and had a really fun night talking about every topic we could cover in 4 hours and it was so much fun.

So, Sierra, I hope you have a wonderful birthday - you deserve it!
-Miki (Becoming What I Always Was

Feelings of Inadequacy 
So this blog post was the very first I ever read of Sierras. I worked with her husband and remembered he mentioned she had a blog so of course I went to go stalk it (I mean...check it out...casually) This was her most recent post at the time and I remember reading it and feeling SO empathetic and every sentence I kept thinking "ME TOO. ME TOO. HEY THATS JUST LIKE ME AS WELL". Her writing style was so relatable to me and the things she was going through I had gone through and I instantly felt connected to her. I pretty much devoured her blog that night and felt so much compassion for Sierra and felt so connected to her, even though we'd never even talked. It didn't take long for us to become the best of friends and turns out, we are essentially twins/lovers so I mean... it was a match made in heaven. I will always be in debt to her for this wonderful friendship, built on a beautifully written blog that struck a chord way deep down in my heart. Seriously the happiest of birthdays to you, my friend. You deserve it. Love your face.
-Catherine (The Influence of You

I love Sierra! She's like a bright shining ball of energy. My favorite thing about Sierra is that you always know exactly how she feels. No holding back here people!
Her honesty and spunk immediately attracted me to her and we've been friends ever since.

++And last, but not least, one of my besties wanted to be included in this post even though she isn't a blogger. This one is directed kind of just towards me, but it works :) 

My Dear Sierra, 
i just spent the past hour going through all the pictures that i have of the two of us. we have undoubtedly had many adventures. to think that we have been friends now for over six years, thats just crazy to me. when i first met you back in fall 2008 i knew that you were going to be a very important person in my life. i knew that we would be eternal friends, it was strange, but i could just sense it. we went through so much those first few months of our friendship, but through all the ish...we remained close. i believe it was our mutual love of 'friends' along with our stubborn need to talk to each other as often as possible. ​
one of my favorite memories of you is during that first semester that we were roommates. you would climb up into my bed at night and we would giggle, gossip, and oogle over the 'men' in our lives...or not in our lives. i had never laughed so much and felt such an instant friendship to anyone in my life and every night i gave thanks to our Father in Heaven for the great blessing of having you as one of my roommates. you got me past that barrier of wearing pants or not wearing pants in socially acceptable situations! more than that you have always been an excellent example of what it means to persevere through the most adverse trials with the testimony you have been grooming your entire life. such endurance was brought to my remembrance while i was on my mission and helped me get through some of my hardest times. I will always count you as one of my best friends Sierra! God sent you to this earth to influence change around you, and you certainly have in me. I love you dear! Happy Happy Birthday!!


And, because, well, it's my birthday (wait…you didn't know that?) I decided I wanted to give one of YOU a present. I'm so kind, I know. I have teamed up with my dear blogging friend, Alexa, who has the most adorable Etsy shop on the planet, to give away 35$ worth of store credit!!! Her shop includes, but is definitely not limited to, these beautiful drawings of my two favorite LDS temples. We have them up in our home! This shop has so many cute things. You will definitely want to be involved in this one. Good luck :) 

Reminder: We will verify entries. Please be sure to only enter if you are planning on truly following. 

Click to join the giveaway

Monday, September 8, 2014

Oh, August. You Will Be Missed.

| June Recap |
| July Recap |

August 2014.
I'm sure gonna miss you, summer. You were good to me.
All photos via instagram.

From top left to right. 
+Taking Saylor on a bike ride. With her in my backpack. Hahahaha. 
+Snake River in Wyoming. So beautiful. 
+Those mountains are the view that I see everyday from my school. Crazy! 
+Happy Sierra :) 
+Niece, Teya. Those eyes! 

From top left to right. 
+Love those antique gas pumps in the middle of nowhere in Wyoming. 
+I love seeing all of the deer running around in Alpine! (yes in the cemetery!)
+Back to School Night.
+T Money and I play on a co-ed softball team!
+Just saylor. Cause she's adorable. 
+Reunited with old friends. 
+Sister & brother in law came in town for a short weekend. So good to see them

Hope your August was as fabulous as ours! Here's to Fall!! Pumpkin everything! Woo too! 

Thursday, September 4, 2014

Without Love, What's the Point? | The Giver

The Giver. 
This book. This movie. Where do I even begin?
I adore it. So much.
I have read The Giver to my students all three years now. I have read this book probably about seven times in total. Words cannot describe how much I love this book. I remember when I was in sixth grade and my teacher read it to me. I would sit there and color and listen to the concept of it, completely entranced by the words and ideas of it all. I was enthralled then and I am enthralled now.

Now, if you haven't read the book (or seen the movie), this is, essentially, the summary of it: Jonas, a young boy, lives in a dystopian world of the future. The Ceremony of Twelve introduces him to a whole new existence, as the Receiver of Memory. Jonas experiences memories from the past that his community has forgotten: color, animals, and a sunset. But, he also has to experience the negative aspects of these memories: the history of hatred, pain and war. Through these memories, Jonas learns the importance of emotion, feelings and love for the very first time.

There are a few aspects, specifically, that I love about this novel:

*I absolutely love the writing. Lois Lowry writes in a way that challenges the reader to think and process. Her word choice, imagery, metaphors and overall writing is fabulous. I love that her writing lets not only me, but my students think as well. Often times, I just want to read and discuss this book with my students for hours (if only! In my dream teaching world!). I don't normally read this book til March or April, when my students are a little bit older and more mature, but because the movie came out and they all have heard about it, I was excited to get this novel started first thing. I am so glad I did. They all are so into it and I want to instill that love of reading into them from the beginning of the year! I love the conversations that take place with my 11-12 year old students. I see their brains processing, thinking and feeling about this book. I am amazed at some of their responses. Here are what some of them have said in recent journal entries:

"In Jonas's world they are missing color, and they never get hurt. If they never get hurt they are never going to learn anything."

"They're dull.(: They listen to what others say. They don't really fight with others. They don't experience pain."

"Basically everybody in Jonas's community just follows the rules and doesn't question them at all. They do not have color, animals, or even their own family."

"In the giver the people have no choices. They want everything to be the same. I would not like this lifestyle because I would want color and sunshine and love."

"Their mising love. They don't understand real pain. "

"Everyone is the same, no one is different. Choices are made for them. We should live in a  world where we make our own choices."

So cool to see that they are learning and thinking, huh? Don't judge their responses. Beginning of sixth grade.I am still working' on them ;)  

*I love that they made the movie. T Money and I saw it on Labor Day and after he was like, "that was boring." But I loved it. Yes, it was kind of slow. But I almost cried like three different times. I love how they added elements to make it more theatrical.  They had to in order to make it a little more interested. I was very impressed with it.

*There is something so incredibly fascinating about this novel. I love the whole concept behind it: without love, what's the point? Because, it's true. Without emotions, without love, without the good AND the bad, the entire purpose of our lives here on this earth are pointless. I couldn't sleep last night and I woke up at 6 am. It was a beautiful, brisk fall morning so I got my pup and decided to go for a long run/walk. On this walk, I kept thinking about the whole concept of emotions, feelings and love. If you read my Word Vomit post then you know that those three things are aspects of life I am fully aware of. Sometimes I get frustrated with my emotions, how I feel them so often, but then I remind myself what my father used to tell me: You may be frustrated that you feel so much negative, but because you feel the lows, you also feel the highs. And it's true. I do know true joy. I feel so much happiness in my life. But, in order to have that, I also feel the sadness. It's a part of who I am :)

I think that's something that we all kind of need to work on. This whole concept of love and emotion. I think we need to learn to be careful when we say, "I love you." I hear my girlfriends, friends and family say all of the time, out of habit. "OMG i love you,"... it's thrown around like it's nothing. It's awesome if you truly do love the person, but it is not necessary to say it five times a night to people.

I think we all need to practice truly loving people. Even when we, well, when we don't want to. I definitely need to work on this. There is good in everyone. And if you stop and look for a minute, you will notice the good. I tend to focus on so much of the negative that I criticize a lot. This is something I need to work on: just truly loving people for who they are, the good and the bad.

I also, lastly, think that, we, as a whole society, need to learn how to express our emotions. Because we are all so plugged in all of the time, I think that this is becoming one of your struggles. Either we bottle them and pretend lie we are fine, or we don't talk about them, or we obsessed over them and talk about them too much. It's okay to feel things. Express it, people!

So, basically, The Giver, a junior novel, led me to all of these thoughts.
It's amazing what a book can do.

Have you read The Giver? Did you like it?
Have you seen the movie? What are your thoughts on it?
Do you agree with some of my statements above?
What are some things you think our society needs to work on? 

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Word Vomit | An Internal Battle.

My students have this bad habit of speaking everything that comes to mind. Literally. Everything. It's quite annoying. But all of the time I tell them to stop word vomiting over me. That they don't have to say everything they think out loud to the whole class.
But, alas, I am going to word vomit all over y'all.
Hope that's okay.

I've been kind of emotional lately.
It's not the outwardly over-the-top emotional where I cry at every tender thing, kind of emotional. I have been feeling a lot internal struggles recently. Isn't that what a lot of our struggles are, anyway? Internal. Struggles that not many people know about?
 I'm not entirely sure why I have been feeling a lot of feelings. It's not that I am depressed or sad. In fact, I am so incredibly content and happy with where I am in my life. After yesterday's post, I am so overwhelmed with love and gratitude for all of the supportive, kind, thoughtful responses I received. It's amazing what writing from the heart does. It's simply that I have had a lot of thoughts swirling around in my head and heart. This isn't necessarily a bad thing. Its simply that I have been weighted, in a way, by these feelings and thoughts.
I can't even begin to tell you where they came from. It's sort of just hit, like a pile of bricks.
And like I stated before, it's not that I am sad. I'm not crying all the time, or mad at someone all of the time, or even bitter to any extent.
I just have been feeling a lot. I feel things very deeply all of the time, but this is different. It's an even deeper feeling. This happens from time to time. And I have found that sometimes it starts with stress and exhaustion. Today I was gone for 13 hours. Ha. And I thought I would have time to do a play! I have this desire and urge to get back on stage; to sing and perform. But right now that's not really an option. I need to savor my energy and put that energy into other things. Right now that is my teaching, my health, my calling and young women, and my relationships.  And I have to remind myself that it's okay. It's okay to not do everything that I want. I have to let some things go, and right now that is going to have to be it. Priorities, baby!
I have recently been feeling sadness because I feel like my effort with friends is completely disregarded. I feel like old friendships are dying, even when I make effort, and that its difficult to make new friends, especially when you're married without kids! I feel like in order for people to socialize with me, I have to do everything, and even when I do, I don't feel like I am treated the way that I should be by friends. And it's disheartening. Tanner said to me other night, "Who's your best friend?" And I almost lost it. Because, even though I have so many amazing friends. I don't have that one best friend. The one who I can call any time about anything. And it makes me sad.
I have recently been feeling angry that I can't seem to get the energy or time to lose this weight that I have been, literally, carrying around.
I have recently been feeling exhausted because I feel like I am constantly on the go. I feel like I am running nine million ways. And they are all good, worthwhile, important things, but alas, I do feel that way.
I have had to make quite a few changes in my lifestyle since summer: with my testimony and religion, with my sleeping and eating habits, with my time management, with my thought processes, with my classroom, with this blog, and much, much more. Change makes me think a lot and that may be a factor. Again, I need to remind myself that it's okay for change to happen. And it's okay to feel the things I do. I am not a weak person for having lots of thoughts and feelings, even if others may not be that way. 
I just have to keep reminding myself to think good thoughts. I am doing so many good things in my life. I am working hard to be better, in all facets. Isn't that what life is all about? 

One of my favorite things to do when I feel this internal battle is go to my Pinterest and scan my Life Quotes, Overcoming, and My Faith Boards and look at some quotes. I find that it gives me perspective on life.
Plus, I am obsessed with quotes. Don't you agree?
Here were some of my favorites this evening:  (yes, I narrowed it down from 50 to like 20. Be proud).


What are you some of your favorite quotes?
Do you find that quotes help you in your life? 
Do you ever have periods of time like this?