Sierra's View: LINK UP: Marriage Goals.

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Monday, February 3, 2014

LINK UP: Marriage Goals.

I am linking up with my blogging lover, Amberly, (yes, lover) for the Marriage and Goal Link Up. I am so excited that I can co-host this month! 
Since this is the month of looooove, I thought this post would be fitting for February (10 points for alliteration). I have been thinking a lot about my marriage and love in general so I am glad that I am co-hosting this month for the marriage link up.

I was married almost exactly 6 months ago and it has been such a wonderful, hard, exciting, challenging step in my life. I have learned more about myself in the last 6 months than I have in the past 6 years of my life. I have learned more about truly loving another person, about thinking of someone else besides yourself during your workday, etc. However, I make mistakes every day in my marriage. I say stupid things, I am selfish, I deal with constant insecurities, and I am working on certain things to make me a better person, friend, and wife.

So, for the next month, I wanted to make some goals regarding my marriage.
I recently have been listening to the book, "The Gift of Imperfection" by Brene Brown. Brene is a researcher who studies vulnerability and shame. And it's amazing. From listening to this novel, I have learned this main idea: that you cannot love another person completely until you love and accept yourself completely. I know we have all heard that before, but through the past few months, this idea has been reiterated to me over and over again. And, I admit, that is something that I struggle with. Sometimes I am so hard on myself, have such high expectations for myself that it becomes one of our struggles in marriage, or well, one of my struggles. But, we are a team, so my struggles are his struggles and vice versa. So I have made some goals regarding loving myself, because, truly and honestly, I have learned that our marriage cannot progress until I have progressed in myself, in my confidence, in my love for myself, etc. (there ARE parts that I am good at, I swear! I am confident about many things about myself, but there is always something you can do to make ourselves better, or more confident).

I want to be willing to put the problem in front of us.  
I have the tendency to keep things in. When I am mad, upset, sad, frustrated, I keep things in. And then, eventually, I blow up. And it usually is at the smallest things, like if T didn't do the dishes, or his side of the bed is dirty. This is not fair to him, to me, or our marriage. I want to be more aware of expressing my feelings out loud, to talk about how I am feeling at the moment, and not bottling it.

I want to recognize my strengths.
Since being married I have had the tendency to compare myself to other women, often times feeling very inadequate. I want to work on looking at the things that I do well in my marriage. We laugh a lot. We have a lot of fun. We are getting much better at budgeting. I serve him (at least try to since it was one of my new years resolutions). It's important to look at the positives of what I am doing, rather than always focusing on the negative.

I want to be willing to accept help and genuinely thank him.
Because I am a stubborn woman, I don't like to accept help from him sometimes. I want to be able to let him help me, especially when I am down and need extra love, guidance, and validation. True vulnerability is allowing someone else to see you that you need help, and let them help you. Because of this, genuinely thanking him is hard for me. I am still not entirely sure why, to be honest. truly thanking other people is not a difficult thing for me. But with my husband, sometimes I have a hard time doing so. I want to thank him and tell him I love him more often.

So there you have it. Some itty gritty details of our marriage.
I am hoping I can remember these goals and continue working on them so that we can be a BAD A couple. I mean, well, we already are. But you know what I mean :)

Link up your goals for your marriage or relationship below!!!! I would love to read your thoughts.

Marriage & Relationship Goals

New to the Marriage & Relationship Goals Link-up? Goals help our relationships grow stronger and get better with time as well as help us move forward and avoid the "ruts" of life. This link-up was created in hopes of inspiring your relationship with your significant other no matter your chapter in life and love. We would love for you to join us in making the things we do in our relationships intentional. 

If you would like more information, click here. If you would like to sign up for the newsletter, click here. If you are interested in cohosting, click here.


  1. I loved this post! I always have to remember to take time alone or I get overwhelmed with everything, it's a huge part of my marriage!

  2. This is awesome!!! So perfect!!! :) You inspire me and I think you are awesome! :) Thanks blog lover ;)


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