Sierra's View: December 2010

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Friday, December 31, 2010


Florence+ the Machine: Dog Days are Over.

This song has been on repeat for about two days now.
Can't help but be empowered!

Happiness hit her like a train on a track
Coming towards her stuck still no turning back
She hid around corners and she hid under beds
She killed it with kisses and from it she fled
With every bubble she sank with her drink
And washed it away down the kitchen sink

The dog days are over
The dog days are done
The horses are coming
So you better run

Run fast for your mother, run fast for your father
Run for your children, for your sisters and brothers
Leave all your loving, your loving behind
You cant carry it with you if you want to survive.

and I never wanted anything from you
Except everything you had and what was left after that too, oh
Happiness hit her like a bullet in the back
Struck from a great height by someone who should know better than

The dog days are over.


Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Puerto Rico.

At Leoni, Rolando and their kids' house (a family Landon taught on his mission) We just sang, talked and laughed in the streets. I fell in love with the children!
4 year old, Ronaldo. I wanted more than anything to be able to speak spanish to him!
He is adorable!


El Yunque National Rainforest

Backside view of El Conquistador resort



playing with Ronaldo at church.

mini island.

making virgin Puerto Rican drinks.

laying (burning) by the pool

This hot tub overlooked an incredible view.

I love colors.
Pretty road!
El Morro

Downtown San Juan

cemetery. Kinda cool. Kinda creepy.haha


I have been humbled on several occasions in the past few weeks.
And I can't contain myself from writing about it.

I have failed continuously in my life. Especially recently.
But by no surprise, the next event that happens after this failure is always a tender mercy. I am constantly reminded of everything that I have.

I failed the test to get into my major.
Then sang in Forgotten Carols with Michael Mclean. I felt the presence of Meme there while singing. It felt her saying to me: "Everything is going to be okay."
I went and saw Savior of the World at Temple Square because my best friend, Meredith, was in it. In it, they acted out the Lord talking to Simon Peter and telling him to feed His sheep. Simon Peter ignores him. The Savior tells him again. He ignores once again. Finally, on the third time, he listens.
I look over to my other best friend, maria, and go: "Sometimes it takes three times."
I cried from the overpowering feeling of the Spirit in both of these incidences.

I was humiliated and hurt by a particular male. For some reason, I allowed that situation to hurt me pretty bad. I'm not sure why.
Then I sang in my LDC Christmas Show. As we sang "Amazing Grace" I could feel the empathy from the Savior and all of my wonderful friends in the choir. I knew everything was going to be okay.

I had a really negative outlook on singing Gloria with Lex de Azevedo with my choir.
The next day, the Provo Tabernacle, a beloved building in Provo burned down. My choir was one of the last choirs to sing in that building ever. I went to the show and sang with the choirs and in one of the songs my body was filled with chills.
The Lord slapped me across the face for that one.

I thought I failed my math final. I spent hours in bed over all of this hard work I had been doing.
I find out in Puerto Rico that I miraculously passed the class.
You have no idea how much I needed that.

I was complaining about my back hurting and from exhaustion in Puerto Rico.
We show up at one of the families that Landon taught, and they lived in a small house. They had nothing. We continued to visit people with such humble abodes and it was such an incredible feeling to realize that these people are so happy with so little.
The kids were so incredible.
The land was incredible.
The people were incredible.

I am so humbled this holiday season.
I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas!
(pictures from Puerto Rico coming soon)

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Feliz Navidad!

Oh ya know,
Just going to be there tomorrow.
I know, I'm spoiled.

Merry Christmas!
'til next year.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Soul Mates & The Christmas Season.

"A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave. A soul mate’s purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, and make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life.”
~Elizabeth Gilbert

I was in awe when I read this the other night. I began to think of how much of my life has been transformed because of some guy who I thought was going to be "the one." I've been with men where the passion was there; the love was clearly existent. I thought we were perfect for each other because we were "soul mates." But what I didn't realize then was that those certain guys had come into my life to teach me something. Their sheer ability to change my rapid heartbeat, to rile me up until I couldn't take it anymore, to get me so angry one minute, then love them uncontrollably the next, was to break down those particular walls talked about above. But she's right. They weren't meant to be next to me forever. They came into my life to break me down, then ultimately build me up.
However, I do think there are some soul mates that are destined to be by your side forever. Those soul mates are those friends who you seem to just connect with on a different level. The ones you are able to share anything with, who think the dumb decisions you make are still outrageously dumb, who roll on the ground laughing at the same joke. The particular friends who may shove you until you break, who get you so mad you just want to slap them. They break you more than anything else imaginable. But they are also more importantly the ones who will be standing at your side on your wedding day. They will be the ones crying with you when life decides to change plans (as it seems to consistently do currently).
How many of us have had people come into our lives ultimately just to change it? Soul mates, whether they have stayed in my life or not, have helped me transform.

There is something so raw, so exquisitely real, about letting go; letting go of an intimate relationship, letting go of a loved one to death, or even letting go of the past. A soul mate has taught me how to let go.

I have learned to be able to look inside myself, see my flaws, my mistakes, and use those to achieve conclusions. However, many people don’t want to go to that level. They are afraid to reach that place because of laziness, or fear, or insecurity. A soul mate has helped me find out what I truly want.

A soul mate has taught me to prioritize my life. I have realized what is important to me.

A soul mate has helped me realize what goals I have.

A soul mate has shown me what this season is about. It is about the birth of the Savior.

I have learned the power of music through the spirit from a soul mate.

This season is truly about transforming ourselves; allowing ourselves to sit down and THINK of who we are and what we truly believe. And a soul mate has led me to this.

I see people never laughing, never enjoying life. I see college kids in a major that they don't love because "it's what they SHOULD do." I have failed academically recently. I didn't pass the test to get into my major, I haven't been succeeding in my math class in the way that I know I am able. But I have a goal. And those goals will be accomplished, even if it means I keep falling down. And a soul mate, has indeed, taught me that.

Merry Christmas. ♥
May your soul mates help transform you this Christmas season.