Sierra's View: Venting Sesh.

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Sunday, November 8, 2009

Venting Sesh.

This isn't for you. This is for me.
It's been a really hard week. And I need the strength of words right now.

When I say "you" I mean... "us", or maybe more specifically...me. But I have learned, through intuition, that there's at least one person out there who this may help.

I guess this wasn't supposed to be easy. Maybe this is all we will ever have, or maybe there is so much more. The unseen cannot be predicted. One less thing to worry about, right? Yet it seems to control our lives. We wonder what tomorrow will bring and if our problems will soon be solved. I believe the hardest lesson we learn in life is that IT GOES ON. Life is what you make it, and holding onto imperfections holds you back from the discovering things about yourself that you can't even imagine. And whether you're ready for the world or not, it's coming at you. And much sooner than you expected. No matter how unprepared we are, we can't stop ourselves from the future. Maybe that's the problem. We want everything. Right now. I wish I could tell you the secret to life, but I guess I don't really know for myself. I know that family and the gospel and friends are sufficient means to that happiness--but then why does it seem as though something is always missing? I think maybe that happiness appears in the things we look to for comfort, the people that are always there to catch us when we fall. Maybe it's the simple things in life that give us some hope to go on. I know life is never easy, but that's why we're put on this earth: to overcome it.

However, I have learned that life is too dark of a place not to have something to hold on to.

Life is temporary. God's love lasts forever.

Anyone can run away from the problems. But that won't make them stronger. In fact, it makes them an even bigger coward. So why do I (we) run? We try to escape the pain. I run from opening up to others. What is so bad that we feel the need to leave all the people we love behind? These are our trials. This is our life. We have the power to make it better.

God doesn't put us through pain to punish us; he does it because he loves us. Kind of a strange concept, I know. The only reason He makes life hard is to help us grow stronger, in hope that we will make wiser decisions.

Sometimes being lost is a good thing. It's an experience when we learn that there's always going to be family and friends there to catch us when we fall. Crying is merely begging to God, when we can't find the strength within ourselves.

I don't think I give myself enough credit. I have slowly come to the knowledge that people can trust me. I have been told before that people don't question their trust with our relationship at all. And that is one of the biggest compliments I have ever received. Loyalty is everything. Throughout life, the people who weren't ever supposed to let you down, probably down. This is so sad, but true. Because people are human beings, we will all be let down. In fact, there will be periods of times where we will let others down as well. More significantly, sometimes we let ourselves down. No one gives us expectations. We set those for ourselves. The only person we need to live up to is OURSELVES.

Sometimes it doesn't seem fair that such a happy person has to deal with something as miserable as depression or being down. I know there are times when we want to drop off the face of the earth and avoid life. And sometimes...that's okay. You don't need to be happy for anyone but yourself.

Sometimes we're so blinded by our darkness, that we forget to open our eyes.
Manage to hang on, even when you may feel like you're falling apart inside. Be loyal. Be family-oriented. Be introspective. Be reflective. Be emotional. Be compassionate. Be passionate. Be non-judgmental. Be selfless. Stand up for something. If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything.
It's those things that define who are--the fact that we are children of God.
When we live according to the truth of the gospel, we feel better about who we are. There's no argument in that statement. Zero.

Life's going to kick us. And in times when we are down too.
But please. please.
Don't give up on being happy. Sometimes it's the only thing that gets you through.

3 comments:

  1. you know how much i needed this blog. love you sierra:)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yes. All very familiar. I can't reply without making it super long. It is enough to say, that I know where you're coming from :) but you have a really good attitude and good insights and will therefore triumph through any trial you will be faced with.
    Keep the faith, love.
    You're beautiful

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